confused

i went to a shabbat dinner tonight with some friends. it was unlike any meal i have ever experienced.

1. it took us 45 minutes to walk to the home of the rabbi.
2. we weren't the only gentiles invited to the meal
3. in a room smaller than our home living room, seven long tables had been set for "regulars" and unexpected guests
4. as we sat down to the meal and settled in comfortably, more and more people showed up.
5. an hour into the "meal" we still hadn't taken a bite and still more people were arriving
6. overflow guests were invited into the host's bedroom where a last resort table had been prepared.
7. while i was crammed into a back corner....literally rubbing shoulders with the person seated next to me...bumping knees with the person in front of me...and completely unable to scoot my chair back, the rabbi continued to say "come on in, there's plenty of room!"
8. we prayed/sang in hebrew and english
9. (when one doesn't know the words.....one simply claps and sings "li le li li li le li...." and claps)
10. the rabbi offered words of wisdom between every course (4) of the meal
11. there was "open floor" teaching towards the end of the night....
12. it was a celebration (as big as Christmas or thanksgiving)....and it occurs every single friday.

the community in israel blows me away. clearly this meal was a dangerous fire hazard for everyone involved. i literally could not stand once i sat down at my place.....and yet there was still plenty of food for everyone. we also clearly did not fit in with the crowd gathered there, yet we were welcomed with smiles and warm conversation.

i guess we kinda do this thing too....with body life at church each week. but this was someone's home. this was the rabbi's bedroom......his house that we were filling. and we were fed for free. they expected nothing from us in return.

i don't understand how a country filled with such hospitable people can also be filled with so much hate. our group has been offered many free drinks and meals. we've been involved in conversations that last several hours because people are more important than appointments. and yet, people on the other side of this fence are unwelcome. among so many in israel, there is an understanding that "what's mine is yours whenever you ask for it." but still, there sneaks in a deep-seated hatred for "the others" that have "invaded."

i just don't understand what has happened to these people to make them so adverse to each other.
i just don't understand how we, who are full of so much wealth, don't understand how to give it away to whoever asks of it.
i just don't know what i can do now that i have all this information.......

guess i'll just keep praying